The Bears promote Mike Tice to offensive coordinator.
Jay Cutler likens a successful offense to driving a car. A REAL one, not one of those hybrid pussy-repellents.
Mike Tice cannot think of a more apt comparison, and plans to incorporate this knowledge into his pregame "Light a Fire Under Their Asses" talks.
Caleb Hanie fell asleep in Driver's Ed classroom because he just wanted to drive, man. And when is he ever going to use this stuff in the real world anyway?
Mike Martz enjoys a white wine spritzer. He's working on that screenplay he's put off for far too long.
Lovie Smith locks himself in the office in preparation for next season. Then he discovers Xvideos. Nice little website they have there. He dials home, "I'm going to be in late tonight, honey! Don't wait up!"
The Packers are still the best team in football.
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